Afraid of Loving Again
“It’s normal to press yourself away from love, isn’t it? It’s normal to want to seclude yourself, and avoid ever being placed in such a situation a second (or third) time. With each strike, it becomes harder and harder to recover. OR, if you condition yourself each time, to be less and less involved/absorbed in each relationship, it may become easier with every turn. The only catch with that is that — you’re not in love. What good is a relationship if it’s meaningless? If it only exists as a therapy to your past failures? So you can say that you’re with someone, a nice someone who you care about, and with whom you have a relationship that works. That’s not to say that you don’t love the person, or that it’s completely meaningless. This just means that the relationship isn’t all it could be (if it’s indeed capable of being more- which isn’t always the case) — and a relationship like that may very well be pointless. So, a thought to tack onto this: what if you pursue something real (whether it be in that pointless relationship or with someone else) — what if you pursue this deep, caring, infatuation of a relationship, the kind that makes you infinitely happy and terribly fearful… and then, you end up losing it, being hurt? What a terrible mistake you’ve made! Or is it? Is it truly better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? What if you’ve already gone through that path once? Should you go through it all over again? Are you setting yourself up for heartache? Or… does your heart ache the entire time that you’re resisting it?” [by Duchess / UNC CHapel Hill]
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October 29th, 2007 at 3:12 pm
“Time heals all wounds”!
October 29th, 2007 at 3:31 pm
It’s all about risks. What’s life without taking the risk?
October 29th, 2007 at 4:29 pm
Time also will make you stronger and invulnerable. Unfortunately, it also means you won’t be capable of falling in love…which is the worst thing.
(It happened to me..wahhh!)
:((
October 29th, 2007 at 7:18 pm
Remember “The Crying Game”? The scorpion stung the man who helped it because it can’t help itself: that’s its nature. As for us, my dear Migs, we are creatures made to love, that’s our nature. And if we get hurt, we cry, but then we continue to love again. Because we can’t help it, it’s our nature to love. If you try to resist your nature, to hold back on the love that fills your being, then I am afraid you will never be truly happy. Go ahead, dare to love. It gets easier with practice.
October 29th, 2007 at 8:27 pm
coffee?
October 30th, 2007 at 6:53 am
the greatest thing you can do is fall in love………
October 30th, 2007 at 6:54 am
or should i say the greatest thing you can ever do is fall in love…….
November 6th, 2007 at 7:56 pm
I used to say that for a shot at happiness, everything is worth it…i had my share of losses, and you may say that at my age I maybe young, then again, I still say that despite the past hurt, and most likely, the future hurts, Love still is a wonderful thing…It may have eluded me for the past tries and failures, but these tries made me happy, nonetheless, and well, for a shot, just even that shot, at happiness, evertyhing is worth it, and is still damn worth it. So sue me! I would still chase my rainbows, because somehow, if ever I will still believe in love, and if ever I do stop believeing, I hope it would be love’s turn to believe in me!
November 26th, 2007 at 2:58 pm
When you’ve been hurt real bad, it is a natural reaction to try to protect oneself again from a similar situation.
but if love, relationships, caring, friendship, and loyalty are those that you’d rather forego because of your terrible fears, you’ll be missing out on the lessons that life is offering you.
This is the only way to grow. And when you’re ripe enough, the right and ripe person will come along your way and you’d wonder, why was I so worried?