“Bi” the way, I’m gay

Confused Brian mistakes Migs as a no-fee psychiatrist for gay/bi guys, thus the following letter. He thought he was gay but got confused when he found sleeping with girls was just as wonderful. Was he once again mistaken? Read on, and share your thoughts!

* * *

hi migs,

you might find this story odd because confusion in gay society goes from straight to oh shit i’m gay! while mine is the other way around but with all the question marks.

So here it is. Not so long ago i have accepted that i am indeed gay. I have proven that myself when i watched the movie 300. i think you know migs that aside from the great action and cinematography, those spartans just brings out the gayness in you. q=) I live a semi gay life style because i am only out to chosen people, mostly close friends. My dilemma comes into time when i get drunk. Whenever i get drunk or just a little bit tipsy I get horned up to both sexes! I just did it with a chick with gusto and woke up without feeling yucky or anything, nag second round pa nga kami. That’s why i question myself am I turning back?? Minsan kasi di ako tinitigasan (pasensiya na po medyo censored) sa lalaki, di rin naman ako nagkakagusto sa ibang babae, pili lang. That’s why i get so confused. My friends would really kill me after those dramas of coming out if i’ll just tell them “pasensya na hindi pala ako bading!” Ano ba ito stage pa ba ito sa pagkakabading. am i still in denial?? nakakalito naman tong buhay na ito, balik na naman ako sa confusion stage! Migs pasensiya na ginawa kitang psychiatrist, libre kasi eh.

- Confused Brian

* * *

Brian, not all gay men abhor sleeping with women. In fact I would dare say a lot of gay men have the capacity to enjoy sex with women. They probably just really prefer men. I do. We contribute a lot to world peace by being at peace with ourselves. ~Migs

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45 Responses to ““Bi” the way, I’m gay”

  1. chuchucaracas Says:

    hmmmm well i never thought that sexual orientation in the first place is defined by with who you slept with. a man is gay because he’s attracted to the same gender not just sexually, even if he already has a constant of the opposite-sex partner (sexually or otherwise). so if he chose to keep his partner of the opposite sex while obsessing for the other that still makes him gay and i don’t think sexual orientation changes after every sexual encounter. it has always been the same, some just realize it later in their lives. (nosebleed)

  2. rOckY Says:

    It sounds to me that Brian has the makings of a TRUE bisexual and not just a straight-acting queer with incorrect word usage. I don’t see anything wrong - although not everyone will be able to understand this orientation and finding a longer-term partner who will accept and understand this side of things might be difficult.

  3. andree Says:

    migs, alam mo.. brian and I share a common story.

  4. george Says:

    bi ka, brian. sometimes you like men, sometimes you like women. of course, there is no such thing as completely bi. but i ascribe to the view that it is possible to have “bi” tendencies and these are fluid, always moving with context(s).

  5. jimg29 Says:

    Banana split is yummy!

  6. eponine Says:

    di ba, makulay ang buhay pag may sinabawang gulay? hehe jsut felt like saying that.

    you are the real bi. bi-yut. jokla este joke lang.

  7. ron Says:

    one doesn’t have to be confined with a stereotypical sexual orientation right? go for what you feel and do what you want to do as long as you know how to handle things… =)

  8. Tita Glo Says:


  9. ace Says:

    Don’t sweat it, Brian. At this stage in your life it is good that you are discovering your sexual leanings. It is possible that you are indeed bisexual, which is fine, although some may have a different opinion about the matter. But in the end, it is your life and these are your feelings. It is true, it can be very confusing for you sexually when you fall for a man one day and for a woman the next. How do you decide? The only reasonable answer to this question is to wait and see until you fall in love with someone, which if you go by how you feel the gender of the person wouldn’t really matter. However, as Rocky mentioned, it may not be easy to find a heterosexual woman or a gay man to understand your needs if you want a long term relationship. Most people usually strive for clarity when it comes to maintaining a long term relationship.

  10. fattyacid Says:

    asus ang daming drama. kung na-accept nya na gay sya before i don’t see any reason para mahirapan syang i-accept na acdc pala sya ngayon…unless he’s expecting an acting award or something to that effect, he better stop the drama as soon as possible and start living with it.

  11. jimg29 Says:

    i really really like tutti fruity gum!

  12. cast Says:

    bryan dear, wala kang problema….. wala… at least you have the capacity to enjoy the flavor (and complexities) both worlds….

  13. jimg29 Says:

    seriously let’s pray for world peace, have you heard what’s going on Myanmar? Military authority are cracking down on monks demonstrators, what can be more serious than this sexual innuendo!

  14. joey Says:

    I really dont believe in this bisexuality crap. even if you make it out with all the women out there but still lust for the same sex, then you are so very gay! wag na magdrama jan. vaklang vakla ang dating eh.

  15. jimg29 Says:

    Burma uprising, this is serious! our thoughts are with these poor asians folks amidst their turbulent times! WORLD PEACE!

  16. sapphire Says:

    isang continuum DAW ang sexuality walang clear na deliniation between hetero, homo, and bi. so wag natin ikahon si brian

  17. anton maton Says:

    huh? ganon? ano sa tingin mo sa kabadingan … parang hairstyle ganon? ngayon kulot at kinky bukas naman unat at na rebonding, ganon?

    bakla, magpa-hot oil ka kaya? baka sakaling matauhan ka? niyahahahahah….

    forever mahaba ang buhok hanggan EDSA,

    anton maton

  18. jimg29 Says:

    Rangoon massacre for crying out loud, lets stop the violence, pray for the monks, burmese, and all who are suffering on this military rule! WORLD PEACE!

  19. anton maton Says:

    okie jimg29 … we get your message. now back to pangungulot!

  20. Ben Says:

    oo i also believe that sexuality is a continuum. remember the famous kinsey study? sabi dun only 10% of men are exclusively homosexual. it’s a broad spectrum. let’s not judge people according to stereotypes. kay confused brian, you’re confused because you’re restricted by social norms. basta ang tandaan mo, choose what you think will make you happy. if both sexes make you happy, choose both.

  21. chuchucaracas Says:

    kinsey? kapatid ba yan ni paris hilton? echos. samakatuwid, 10% lang tayo? echos ulit.

  22. Wendell Sanchez Says:

    Don’t fret, as long as you really enjoyed what you have just done there’s no harm in it. And as long you are not psychologically bothered by it wala ring problema. Just be honest dun sa mga pinapatulan mo para hindi sila maging apektado lalo na if they start falling in love with you. Getz moh???

  23. juan Says:

    best way to resolve this: stop being stuck by labels that others impose on you, and those that you impose on yourself

  24. jimg29 Says:

    brian my dear, sa maniwala ka’t sa hindi you are a eunuch, my advice is for you to join monastery of monks that will help you find elusive peace, idawit mo na rin si anton maton, at doo’y wala na kayong kukulutin dahil pulos semi-cal ang men. WP

  25. from1fagtoanother Says:

    Jimg29 .. you made me laugh out loud.. you should start writing a blog..

    Brian … the more choices you have. Why sulk when you should be celebrating? ;)

  26. marco jordan Says:

    brian, only you can truly say if you’re gay or not. i’m pretty sure that deep down, you know where you stand.

    isa lang masasabi ko, once you go cock, you never go bock!

  27. dowell Says:

    Brian. Sometimes when I let myself believe that I am confused, I can see images of gay people laughing at me, at my age, how come that there were episodes that I have no preference to both sexes. But just to get rid of this confusion, I just let myself accept that I am neither bi nor straight, I am gay because I don’t have that juggernaut inclination to have sex with women, although in the past I used to do it with them. Maybe I was born to feel more than to live and the mantra I keep is, for as long as two souls connect, then go and strengthen the nexus, connect!

    My inclination is to get romantically connected with men, but not primarily driven by lust. I lust them sometimes, I do not lust them other times, but I can love them even in times when I am sexually restrained by the absence of lust.

    If having sex to both sexes confuses you, check with which sex you are more inclined to fall in love. Maybe your being gay is not expedient to just the physicality of connecting, your desire to find love will tell you who you really are. Who knows, you are straight just looking for the helpmeet lifestyle.

    Anton Maton: finally, natagpuan ko na ang pag-ibig, sa iyo. hahahaha

    Hi Migs~!

  28. anton maton Says:

    dowell … type mo maging siyota ng kabit? game ako … niyahahahahah!

    ang kabit ng bayan,

    anton maton

  29. jimg29 Says:

    sala sa init sala sa lamig; kung minsa’y maalat, matamis, matabang, maanghang, mapakla, maasim; may bagyong Acheng, Bading, Bakling, Carding, Dowelling, o Yoling! Just be careful, or else in your confusion the 300 spartans will rise again to haunt you!

  30. mekare Says:

    sometimes the biggest problem of them all is picking the right “label”. we all try to fit these prescriptions, which we formulated in the first place.

    people = sheep?

  31. eponine Says:

    ano yan people=sheep? natawa ako dun. parang me implications of not bisexuality but bestiality. eeewwww.

    ace and dowell msut have an advice column here kasi ga-novela talaga lagi ang comment, pero maganda. hehe. sing-ganda ng lola mo. pero hindi pwede kasi iisa lang ang reyna dito. world peace migs!

    seriously, let’s pray for those in myanmar.

  32. Asyano Says:

    Mga fellow readers at kay Migs,please click this link and watch the video:Animals being skinned alive for their fur by some Fashion Giants.MEdyo of sa topic ito.

  33. pepron Says:

    I’ve had hundreds of sexual encounters with men but I never really got a hard-on when we’re both there naked. Funny thing was, I had once with a woman and I cummed, which never happened to me before with guys. Am I gay? Oo namannnn..hehehe.

  34. astroboi Says:

    haha i thought someone wrote my letter and submitted it! weird thing with me too is that when i’m drunk or tipsy its the time i get really horny with women! i obviously don’t consider myself straight anymore but i guess i just swing both ways…

  35. cris Says:

    You know there is NO PROBLEM AT ALL> DO whatever makes you happy, be it with GIRLS OR BOYS. You and a lot of people are caught up with LABELS. Is it important if you are gay, bi, or whatever, just get laid and fulfill your carnal urges. People are putting to much pressure on what you are. TAO ka. Yun lang yun.

  36. jimg29 Says:


  37. ace Says:

    @eponine- :)not to worry eponine. there is no contest,the throne is all yours. i promise you.

    On a serious note, yes, our prayers for the people of Myanmar are called for at this juncture. The junta dictatorship has been going on for far too long. Let us hope that the pressures from most of the world’s governments will be heeded.

  38. avp Says:

    Being GAY or STR8 is not behavior, or who you bed.. you can be GAY and never suck dick, or sleep with other men.. Some gay men marry, have 8 kids, and screw their wives.. still gay.. Being gay or str8 is about sexual PREFERENCE..not behavior. If you PREFER men.. your gay.. If you jack off to BRAD and not ANGELINA.. youre gay.. If you suck dick.. but youre doin it for the money and not coz youre into it.. youre probly str8.. YOu cant say you like BOTH equally…thats a cop out… You always PREFER one to the other. always.. thats my 2 cents on the matter. Hope it helps.

  39. avp Says:

    .. if you log on to manilagayguy.com and take the time to write an open letter about your “confusion”.. youre GAY.

  40. karlito Says:

    hahaha pareho kami… although i get attracted to both guys and girls, i’m more fond of guys BUT whenever i get tipsy or drunk, my confidence level rises (duh) and i start feeling like i just have to bang a girl. probably i’m just insecure or something? but who cares ba? i don’t think labeling is that important these days

  41. Tokoy Says:

    As my logic professor said:

    “You can only choose one. It’s illogical to be two places at the same time.”

    And based on Carl Jung’s theory that we are all born bisexual. The only time we identify our sex is when society steps up and points out what your sex would be based on stereotypical roles.

    Kaya lang naman nagagalit ang madlang people sa mga bakla is because of the though of procreation wherein it involves a boy and a girl for that aspect na samantalang mga bakla boy to boy lang daw. Pero since mga bakla ngayon eh bakla pa rin maski may anak at pamilya na… well, homosexuality surely has evolved from the overgeneralized notions of society.

    Kaya Brian, don’t be alarmed because whatever you choose in life society can only pertain to your personal mask. Ikaw pa rin nakaka alam kung bakla ka nga or hindi.

    The only time you have self-realization about these matters is when you ostracize and castrate yourself from the viewpoint of society.

    Live life, vive Cuervo!

  42. Shane Says:

    “Sexuality is like fluid, whether you’re gay, straight or bisexual, just go with the flow.”

  43. berdengmansanas Says:

    You just need to have some time to make you realize who and what you really are. There is nothing wrong about your present situation.

  44. barron Says:

    pare-pareho lang yan.laht ng meaning ng gay nakakabit na. kumbaga all in one na ang GAY word.

  45. Joseph Says:

    Brian, I think we are in the same boat and for that matter, I can say that you are still in denial. You know you’re gay, and you just can’t accept that fact.

    Like you, I am still struggling.

    I love girls, but I like the company of boys. Does it make me a bi or gay? I don’t know. Gay or bi, it doesn’t matter. What matters most is what makes you really happy. Because for me, being gay is lonely and sad.

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