I was talking on the phone with an elderly (mid-40s) gay guy last night. Two girl friends were just too excited for me to have another “long term relationship” so they paired me up with this “tall, subtle, good looking, and very intelligent” friend of theirs (description theirs). It was a breath of fresh air, really. It’s so wonderful to talk to such learned man, so experienced, and so full of wisdom. While on the phone, I was like a young boy eager to learn, listening and sitting at his master’s feet.
Of the many things we talked about one vignette that struck me was a conversation he had with his late Dad. Apparently, in his informing his Dad about his decision to switch careers (from the medical field to designing clothes), his dad said:
Son, there are four things I cannot decide for you, even if I wanted to. First, your political affiliation. You decide the political principles you believe in, and your idea of how society should be organized. Second, your religious convictions. I raised you up as a Catholic but if you ever so decide to be something else — a Moslem, a Protestant, whatever — then you should follow your conscience, not me. Third, your career. Your career is the one that will make you get of bed excited as you wake up, and get you going day in, and day out. It will be such a waste of life if you choose to make a career out of other people’s fancies. Lastly, your choice of life partner. You will be the one to love and live with that person, so it is really your decision to make. May it be a girl or a guy, son, you will decide for yourself. There is just one thing I want you to promise me, son: that whatever your decision may be, that you will be happy.
With that, a sliver of tear quietly slid down my cheek. Awwww.
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