Gay Daddies in the Closet
The New York Times says:
Studies of twins show that homosexuality, especially among men, is quite heritable, meaning there is a genetic component to it. But since gay men have about one-fifth as many children as straight men, any gene favoring homosexuality should quickly disappear from the population.
But why is it that people say “parami ng parami ang mga bading… di naman nanganganak!” How come the “gay gene” persists?
Would it be that there are actually a lot of fathers (daddy!) out there who carry the “gay gene” — they are gays but choose not to practice homosexuality? And that those married men who gallivant in the gay scene are just the tip of the iceberg? Interesting.
Possibly Related Entries:
- Pinoys on the “Down Low”
- Mom on Son’s Coming Out
- Pinoy Gay Bloggers
- For our next podcast: Coming Out
- Pinoys on the Down Low
- Ken Escudero in “Sikil”
- Foot Tapping = Cruising for Sex?
- PNP: It’s OK to be Gay, BUT…
April 11th, 2007 at 8:44 am
my dad is not gay but i used to teased him that since i am…
kaw migs have you ever ask your dad about it???
(ai baka ndi kapa out sa inyo)…
April 11th, 2007 at 8:45 am
totoo ka dyn migs sa amin may tito akong bading at ako DARNA heheheheeh….. sabi nga nila nasa lahi namin yun pati pinan ko tivoli ano bayan nasamin na lahat diba happy pamily kami then dalawa kaming DARNA si ate V noon at Angle locsin ngayonn…..
divahhhh…….. but wa sa pag ka nows ang pamily ko sa pagiging DARNA ng lola mo even ang old darna na si ate V with is my tito di nya knows nohhh…. but ewan ko rin baka alam na nila di lang sila nag sasalita kasi nman ako nalang walang asawa sa family ko my mom told to me she want to see my junakissss engka ko na lang sa mudang career mo ako MUMAY….. at ang naka inis pa dun super porsing ang MUMAY ko ang shupatemban kes na bunso na OTOKO ehh may jusawa at may 2kids na…..
alam mo migs ayoko talaga ang jusawa nohhhh chikka ko nalang sa kinila na si angel locsin ako pag nasa 35 na ako but now enjoy muna ang buhay even wala jowa….. at ang say kes pa ng MUMAY ko kailangan daw pag juwi ko dyn sa pinas ehhh may jusawa na ako wait????
uwiaan ko kaya ng lalakeng briton ang MUDANG hahaha….. (what do you think) sabihin ko josawa ko di kaya maloka ang MUMAY ko divahhhh….
ahhhhh….. basta malalaman din nila pag natuklasan na nila nag dairy ni cho-karla ay este cho-kardo pala……
see you migs love yahh…..
April 11th, 2007 at 9:06 am
@jholou - hmmm di ko pa naman natanong sa dad ko, but i have an uncle who is gay. and yes, i’m not yet out to my family.
@krissss (na may apat na ’s’) - your comment just reminded me that i need to brush up on my sward speak. hehehe!
April 11th, 2007 at 9:47 am
hmmm… hindi naman cguro yung dad ko…
by the way, my college professor in psychology before told us that there are studies which showed that among men who were with other men in the same room (all of them naked), homophobic men have the greater tendency to look at the other men’s sexual organs. hmmm, interesting din di ba?
April 11th, 2007 at 10:02 am
My dad is gay, but closeted, and so is his brother, my uncle. On my mom’s side, I have two uncles whom I suspect are gay — one of them is married, the other a priest. My mom is definitely straight. Is there a gay gene? There is surely some genetic component, as in my case. But that doesn’t explain my own brother, who is straight. I believe it’s some combination of heredity and upbringing, the old “nature or nurture” debate.
April 11th, 2007 at 10:04 am
Raymond - *napalunok* your dad is gay!? how did you come to know? kuwento!
April 11th, 2007 at 10:36 am
sa family namin dalawa kaming bading! haha. pero nasa closet pa siya and we respect that even though he’s much older than I am. (ay in-out si ate!) after i came out, he was distant, bitter and cold towards me. but i digress.
baka totoo nga that “it” runs in the blood! my uncle is also gay. and im sure i have cousins na bading din. hehe.
but come to think of it, married men are hot! kase they have all these repressed desires and sexual fantasies! lol. ayoko nga lang maging home-wrecker.
April 11th, 2007 at 10:39 am
@Raymond!
Wow! napa mega tambling naman ako sa kwento ng buhay mo! as in OMG! wow!
April 11th, 2007 at 11:21 am
i guess kya dumadami gay because gay men tend to defy nature and nag-aasawa sila to get approval from the public. tendency, they bear child na gay. i’ve seen a classmate na gay “daw” tatay pero sa kaniya talaga lumabas.
April 11th, 2007 at 11:26 am
It was a quiet Saturday evening, back in 1998. I was already a lawyer, living in my own apartment, and I went back to my parents’ house for my usual weekend visit. I was in my old bedroom doing nothing in particular, when my dad entered my room, with a serious look on his face. Locking the door behind him, he sat on a chair and said he needed to talk to me about something. With great difficulty he told me how he was being blackmailed by a man whom he has sex with, and pleaded for my help. I was not out of the closet at that time, but my father’s revelation that quiet Saturday evening illuminated so many heretofore dark corners of my life. I did not come out to my parents that night (ayokong agawin ang eksena sa daddy ko!) but a few more things happened after that, which are too long to detail all here. You will have to wait for my book. I am sharing this with MGG readers because this may be helpful for you, but I would like to request that you please respect my father’s right to remain in the closet. Thank you to all. World Peace!
April 11th, 2007 at 11:50 am
ganda naman topic d2. A gay gene…? i think an episode in OPRAH confirmed about the discovery of this hereditary gay gene. I dont know any in my family, all r married. Thou sometimes you can hear may male siblings & dad say while watching tv “ang pogi naman ng lalaking yan… well i just agreed in silence… hehehe) raymond (will waite 4 ur book). I dont know gay lingo also so hirap basahin comments ni Kri(sx4)
April 11th, 2007 at 12:01 pm
i’ll wait for raymond’s book! it’s interesting. pag nalaman kasi ng tatay ko na nasa militar bk firing squad ako.
April 11th, 2007 at 12:18 pm
Intersting yung kwento ni raymond. I’ll wait for your book. Thanks for sharing it, wala pa man sya, hehe.
April 11th, 2007 at 12:23 pm
Raymond - you are the 2nd Pinoy MGG reader I know who is writing a gay-related book. It’s great to know we have PLUs (people like us) who are interested in sharing their thoughts and experiences to the rest of the community. Mabuhay kayo!
April 11th, 2007 at 1:31 pm
My dad is gay, my mom doesnt know but i saw the signs and i was able to find proof, some loveletters from some guy he had worked with in the middle east and tons and tons of gay smut material. Im so sorry for myself for intruding his privacy, but when youre young and so curious anything worth knowing is worth something. maybe its in the genes, i mean i know im gay and i have 2 cousins who are also gay but then environment plays a role of honing the totality of ones self. Correct me if im wrong but, maybe being to submerged with the male species could spark the gay genes??? I mean maybe thats how my dad came to know about it right, he was surrounded by mostly men and maybe he crossed over, I dont really care if he’s gay or not, hes my father and all, cant do anything about it. I know my dad and that guy of his still has some contact, all the whisphering over the phone, the late night out….. God its the same thing that I do… maybe this is what like father like son means ahahhaha…
April 11th, 2007 at 2:02 pm
Studies conducted that homosexuality is caused by the following (in order):
1. Fatherless figure (absentee father., etc)
2. Labeling (calling of names such as faggot, queer even at early age)
3. Molestation (age 3 to 19)
4. Female environment
5. Gay male figure
So you see, the genetic homosexual code is not yet discovered. So unless it would be, i’ll believe the above mentioned.
April 11th, 2007 at 4:02 pm
To Raymond and Simon, how I wish you will be there once my two sons find out that I’m gay, so that you can enlighten them….
But they’re still little kids ( 1 & 6 yrs. old ), so, I think I still have plenty of time to brace myself once that ” discovery ” takes place.
Lagi nga akong may fear na what if one of them turns out like me. They’re both close to me to the point na mas gusto nila akong katabi kaysa sa mom nila.Lagi nga kaming sinasabihan ng misis ko na magsama kayong mag-aama, he he he he he he he,kasi di na siya makatabi sa akin.
But I read somewhere that boys who are closer to their fathers are less likely to bacome gay compared to boys growing up close to their mother.
Right now, I have a bi male lover ( a father also but separated )who frequents our house and who’s also close to my sons. In fact, ninong siya nung isa. My wife gets along with him, too.
But Simon, unlike your dad, I don’t keep letters ( ebidensya yun, he he he he he ) and we never talk over fone once im home ( its a rule for both of us ).
Well, I guess I’ve shared enough. And another thing , I have a macho gay brother ( gym fit and all but living in with another man ).
April 11th, 2007 at 4:11 pm
@ROB - wow. thanks for sharing. i’m really amazed with all these sharing from readers like you — it makes me understand this chaotic world i bit better. i love MGG not because i created it — i love it because through it i am able to learn from many people from all over. salamat Rob, and all MGG readers/commenters!
April 11th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
i don’t know anyone in our genes who’s gay. but i was molested during my elementary days by a stranger in a resort where we both took shower ( it’s a public shower and lined up so it’s normal) i dunno if im gay or affeminate or something but i sure got hard on i dunno maybe bcoz of sensation?! i dunno… and it keeps haunting my sexuality everytime i remember it… am i gay or what?
April 11th, 2007 at 4:24 pm
oh and yeah surprising i used a vulgar name did i? well bcoz i considermyself as a gay for whatever reason i dunno… i got attracted to *some* men but if they’re naked i wanted to puke… i tried once to have intimate moment with a male and i didn’t get aroused… honestly i’m still confused if i’m gay or not but bcoz i had unwanted experiences while i’m still a kid i consider myself as gay since they said that when someone with your same sex had u u r also gay.. is it true? i got attracted to females though and got a number of gf already… am i gay? bi? or just my belief that i’m gay? i’m visiting gay sites to get infos of being gay n i keep on comparing myself… and i’m not familiar with gay linggos but i know a few bcoz of some of my friends.. i do have gay friends though but never was and never will i have any sexual encounters with them. They know me i’m sooo openminded and not judgemental that’s why i had lots of friends… so am i gay?
April 11th, 2007 at 4:36 pm
Migs, thanks a lot to you also for this venue.
Btw, re my lover, whenever, he comes to our house, its always a barkada inuman kaya di talaga kahina hinala ( just a tip to those who want to bring their lovers close to their “real” families ). Minsan nga inuman barkada, tapos misis ko tsaka lover ko nag uusap sa isang tabi, I wonder if they’re talking about me, he he he he he he he he.During those instances, I thank God for giving me these 2 people who are giving me such sweet love.
By the way, my brother knows about me, and when I was still single, he used to “recommend” me to his friends, he he he he he he he.
April 11th, 2007 at 4:54 pm
i’ll change my screen name parang ang laswa kc parang may gus2 gawin hehehhe…
April 11th, 2007 at 5:36 pm
ROB, kainggit naman…. i wish i could be like that.. hehehe:)
April 11th, 2007 at 6:21 pm
in our little town, our clan is known for the “gay curse.” there are just many of us in our clan who belong to the third gender so that people are no longer surprised if the son of a relative turns out to be gay.. marami talaga kami, from granduncles, to uncles, cousins, nephews and grandchildren. but mind you, some of our clansmen are closetted..
i once overheard my dad talk about this “curse” in the clan with some friends, that when one would mention our family name, people from our place would always associate it with “kabadingan.”
i would have opted to become straight if i had a choice but, happily, i have lately began to accept my sexuality… i still hear people whisper about my sexuality but i don’t get mad with it anymore.. i just want to let it pass.
i have just started to explore my sexuality and at 29, i finally decided to have a lover.. if people would find out about it, care ko lang… im just tired staying inside the closet.
April 11th, 2007 at 7:19 pm
I read before that having an older brother increases the chances of being gay. kaya since the reasons for being gay seems to be the topic here, I found the link.
Hmmm… On a different note, it is said that it is a confluence of both biological and environmental factors that make the gay man (or woman). In my case, I lean towards the biological factors primarily because I always had a hard-on for guys (not girls), and we all know that you can’t force yourself to get hard, the hormones and pheromones and whatnot do that on your behalf.
April 11th, 2007 at 7:42 pm
to rob. hey, when the time comes and your ready to tell your sons, just inform me and i’ll do my best to be there.
April 11th, 2007 at 8:26 pm
Wow, gee, thanks Simon. As much as possible, I don’t want them to know that side of me. But then, who knows, I might get caught in a situation as in Raymond’s dad?
Ian, I have some friends and ex lovers who are good fathers/husbands and at the same time good gay lovers. So, I think it’s just a matter of handling things, setting clear rules to yourself and your lover and giving what’s due to your family ( and also to your lover ). Also, choose the right lover.
April 11th, 2007 at 9:25 pm
it’s both nature and nurture daw though not mutually exclusive. even hereditary conditions are influenced by upbringing because of its influences in your lifestyle. kunyari, may risk of heart disease sa pamilya nyo. pero kung healthy upbringing kayo, pwedeng hindi ito lumabas or late ang paglabas.
so someone with the “gay gene” may not grow up to become gay because nothing in his upbringing made it come out.
part of what should be considered is current society’s openness to gayhood. people are more exposed and therefore more likely to “activate” the gene (so to speak).
April 11th, 2007 at 11:07 pm
hi ulit kakagising ko lang thats why i read all of your comments bye the way thanks migssss (4s yan ha……)
any way ask ko lang sa mga daddy na gay tanong lang po ha walang personalan ito ay isang tanong na galing sa aking puso…..
alam kong mahirap ang may asawa at the same time bading ka diba pano nyo na gagawa yung mga bagay na mangloko sa asawa nyo na bading kayo??
ako i have a friend here alam nya na bading ako sabi ng babae kung friend ang hirap na makahanap ng lalake so far kasi di nila alam kung totoo ba o peke???? kasi sabi nya katulad ko raw na di halata ang pagiging bading my crush pa nga daw sya sakin ehhh but when i open up my real me ayon ang loka naloka hahahah… kasi di nya daw akalain na DARNA ako….
in other way around alam ko some of us want they have there oun siblings but come to think of it nangloloko tayo ng ibang tao daba pano kung malaman pa ng asawa nyo yan
may kasibihan nga ang mga babae pumatol kana sa ibang babae wag lang sa lalake lagi ko itong naririnig sa may asawa kong friends kasi nga parang you digrade them at yung pagiging bababe nila or RESPETO ika nga…..
yung friend ko na nasabihan ko ng tunay kong kulay ehhh i ask her sabi ko what if kung may asawa kana at di mo alam na bading pala ano ang magiging reaksyon mo dun ikakamatay nya daw dahil of all time pala from the very 1st time ng pag kikita nila ay makasinungalingan na nabubuo……
like what i said in my comments up here i dont want to have a girl in my life asawa diba all of us may babae na pakirandaw alam natin kung ano ang nasasaloob ng pagiging babae kaya alam natin kung paano masakatan di ako nagsasalita ng tapos sa sarili but if ever na mag karoon ako ng asawa ill make sure na wala na akong lalake sa buhay ko kasi ayokong saktan ang aking mahal like in man to man relationship gusto ko isa lang at walang extra curicular activities ika nga bading tayo alam natin kung paano masaktan ang isang babae dahil babae nag puso natin diba
tanong lang po ito ha walang personalan….
April 11th, 2007 at 11:59 pm
“NAKAKALITO!!!” “NAKAKALOKA!!!”…ang dami ko nang nababasa na mga studies tungkol sa pagiging bading, eh wala pang malinaw na conclusion tungkol dito. Lahat puro mga haka-haka lang…kesyo psycjological, environmental factors, etc. etc. ano nga ba? Di ba kaya spiritual? Pero ang dami rin namang eskandalo sa mga spiritual leaders natin ang nangyayari di ba? Baka naman natatalo na ng “Devil” ang “SAINT” n all of us? nagkukulang na ta-u ng tiwala sa “KANYA” na cyang makapangyarihan sa lahat? di nga kaya? o…walang magagalit hah! opinion ko lang ito…say ur side, “AMEN”.
April 12th, 2007 at 12:02 am
lUMIHIS BA AKO SA TOPIC? GAY DADDIES PALA ANG PINAG UUSAPAN!
April 12th, 2007 at 12:28 am
That’s really interesting. SO far, from my father’s side and mother’s side, ako lang ata ang bading. I think my father is a closetted bading! Haha! That would be weird because if he is, then he butch! Hehe. Nice blog you have here.
Visit my blog, too, if you have time. It’s new and there’s nothing there yet, but I promise to post interesting and sexy stuff there soon!
clarkifications.wordpress.com
April 12th, 2007 at 1:00 am
great topic. in our family, both my father’s and mother’s side, ako lang ata ang bading. Yung sinususpetsa ko na cousin kong tibo ang ikakasal na next week, which is still unbelievable for me. I’m already pushing 27 and still cannot imagine myself marrying a woman and living a double life with another gay lover tapos magkakaanak pa ako. I still do not believe in living this kind of life. I cannot imagine the pain and deceit I will bring my family if I should pursue this kind of life. Pero I dont know. Baka kakainin ko lang ako sinasabi ko kasi I’m leaning towards having my own children (re: not adopted) in the future and prolly the only way I can do this is by marrying someone and not looking for a babymake of sorts. I’m still afraid of the mysteries of the unknown but I’m okay living my queer life as of the moment. The only fear I am dealing now is if my parents (who can be very loving and all but have the narrowest of minds when it comes to these things) find out. I guess ang sasabihin ko na lang dyan is yung imortal na quote ni Melanie Marquez that goes, “We’ll burn the bridge when we get there!” DI ba? Toink!
=)
(http://clarkifications.wordpress.com)
April 12th, 2007 at 1:19 am
It’s interesting that there’s alot of us here and we all have different stories. Like in my case, me and my partner now (and an ex boyfriend of mine) have domineering mothers. I dunno if that was a factor of me becoming bi/gay. But in my case, i was closer to my father until his death when i was 17. He was affectionate but certainly not gay. Also, my first gay encounter became my boyfriend, but before that, i had a string of girlfriends. I’m always thinking that maybe if i didn’t meet my ex boyfriend that day (on that day i was really sad and he cheered me up), would i have still been straight?
April 12th, 2007 at 1:20 am
I just want to share my personal experience related to this topic. My brother is gay. Pano kong nalaman? Kasi lagi syang may kasama na “kaibigan niya” and one time kaming tatlo lang naiwan sa bahay at sinusubuan ng “kaibigan” ng kuya ko yung kuya ko. I never told it to anyone, kahit sa nanay ko at sa isa ko pang kuya. Two years ago, we had a major fight na tipong nagsapakan kami. Sa sobrang inis ko, sinabihan ko siyang “BAKLA KA!” sa harapan ng nanay ko. Namutla ang kuya ko and hindi nakapagsalita. Ako ang nag-out sa kanya sa buong family namin. After that, parang naging open secret na lang yung sexuality ng kapatid ko. Noong nagkaroon siya ng GF, kami pa (nanay ko at ako) ang nagtatakip sa Kuya ko kapag kasama niya yung “kaibigan niya.” Funny kasi just this year nabuntis yung GF ng kuya ko and nagpakasal sila. I know it’s kinda weird, pero ‘m always praying na sana huwag magkagulo in the future dahil sa preference ng Kuya ko. Haay…
April 12th, 2007 at 2:29 am
I always believe that homosexuality is biological in nature. Even animals like male dolphins and bonobo apes have homosexual culture.
So it’s not surprising that humans can become homosexuals simply because of their genetic make-up.
April 12th, 2007 at 4:22 am
Since the topic is about “gayness & Dad’s”, let me share through this forum my case.
I think most of the above mentioned factors of how one becomes gay is present in mine. Except for the genes issue, because I am the “only one” in the family.
I grew up in an all female environment, (I came from a broken family), my mom, my sister, my cousins, our yaya, my sister’s friends, etc..My sister’s playmates are my playmates too. I have been treated by some relatives as gay since childhood. But occasionally, I get to see my dad & be w/ him for some time. He has another family then.When I was 9 going 10, I have my first taste of sex, been molested by an adult relative, maybe he’s 25 then, & it happens every time we take on vacation to their place. I was scared,but somehow, I kinda liked it.
After that “first time”, whenever I get the chance to be w/ my dad, I peep & hold his dick inside his pajamas while he’s soundly asleep.
Back in high school, I never thought I would grew up this tall(now I’m 6′1″), been the Prince Charming since First Year up to Fourth year, Mr. JS Prom, & an officer in our CAT. There are some girls who really showed their attraction towards me, some of them became my girl friends.
From then up to now,I have 3 I considered serious relationships.
I do also have relationships w/ gays, being their kept boy. And guys as well, but I do it secretly and away from our place.Away from the public eyes..because I really hate to be the subject of rumors. That is why I’m trying my best to hide it.
Now, I’m in my mid 30’s, & still single, I do have a girl friend right now who is eager to get married, but I have some second thoughts.There are a lot of “what ifs”… I was scared in getting married, but I do want to have my own family already since my contemporaries have their own now. I wanted to be a Dad too…
April 12th, 2007 at 4:27 am
I don’t know if my dad is gay. But I saw thourgh the eyars some figures and outstanding characteristics that made me recently think that maybe he is. I know my elder responsible brother is. I know I am gay. Will the fruit fall far from the tree?
April 12th, 2007 at 6:05 am
The debate is still going on among scientists as to whether there is in fact a gene or a cluster of genes that determine homosexuality. Since sexual orientation is such a complex trait, to date, what the majority of respected scientists believe is that homosexuality is attributable to a combination of psychological, social, and biological factors. Some other experts believe that changes in the brain of the fetus occur during the gestation period in the womb (as caused by the mother’s hormones) in response to having successive male children. In other words, the greater the number of older brothers a young male sibling has the more likelihood of him to be gay.
As for the environmental factors, according to statistics, the vast majority of gays come from ordinary, average family. In other words, for most, there was no abuse, no gay influence, no sexual trauma or any other aberrations that can be pinpointed as a homosexual determinant. This makes a lot of since, because usually, there is just one gay child in a family within a number of siblings and as a family they all live under the same environment. The evidence is even more compelling when studies were made with families who grew up before the sixties (before the sexual revolution) where the nuclear family was the norm (before divorces, gay icons, gay movies or gay literatures).
As for the genetics, men receive an X chromosome from their mother and a Y chromosome from their father (women receive two Xs, one from each parent); because of this it is assumed that the possible ‘gay gene’ is inherited maternally. Mothers can pass on this gene without themselves, nor their daughters, being homosexual. So, following this assumption, a gay male (XY) child can only inherit the ‘gay gene’ from the mother and not the father. This is the reason why the ‘gay gene’ will continue to persist, unless the whole female population suddenly disappears.
In the end, whether it is nature or nurture, genetic or not, it won’t make any difference to the people living their lives. People will have the same needs, desires and aspirations as always. Their need to be accepted as part of the human race will still be the same, and their hope for a decent job (free of discrimination) and some kind of happiness with someone will always be there. After all, people don’t need experts to tell them how to feel and think the way they do, they simply do.
April 12th, 2007 at 9:20 am
Although wala pang scientific evidence at dahil mag confirm kung sino sino ang bading sa ating kapamilya, I do believe nasa lahi at dugo yan.
April 12th, 2007 at 9:41 am
to rob: i dont like this statement “Lagi nga akong may fear na what if one of them turns out like me.”
just maybe because later in life this fear would turn to denial…denial would alienate…that leads to the things every homosexual wants being accepted both in the family and the community…
i know u are a great father and a loving lover but try to drop this fears…i bet youre happy with your life as of the moment…and if one of them is just like you,,,then embrace and be happy with it
forgive me if im thinking out loud…
April 12th, 2007 at 12:46 pm
actually, mali yung tanong eh…..it implies that if one is gay, it necessarily follows that his would-be son would be gay….of course not……dumarami ang mga bakling kc marami ang binibigyan ng ’special gift’ ng Panginoon..yes, I view gayness as a gift from God….Go Sistahs!
April 12th, 2007 at 1:05 pm
Yes, Mimi, I do agree. Ang ating kabaklaan ay isang natatanging biyaya ng Panginoon. Lahat ng aking naging accomplishments sa buhay na ito ay masasabi kong nag-spring forth sa aking special gift of pagiging bakla. Praise the Lord, Sistahs!
April 12th, 2007 at 1:08 pm
mimi, ganda naman sagot mo “gayness as a gift from God!” so di siya abomination from on High.
April 12th, 2007 at 3:02 pm
I do have some people in our place I observed being gay but are married and have children, and I am quite sure of them being gay. Maybe because here in our place, the prevalent way of thinking that being gay is abnormal.
April 12th, 2007 at 4:34 pm
Yung isa pang naiiisip ko is: are they really gay or bisexual with preference towards males? Coz I got this weird theory that a huge majority of the population is actually bisexual at konti lang ang totoong straight hetero or straight homo. This would account for the numerous “friendly” activities het people do with members of the same sex, which may or may not release latent tendencies.
April 12th, 2007 at 5:24 pm
I have an uncle who, I suspect, is gay. But my mum’s ex-business partner, I had sex with when I was little. I think that made me gay.
April 12th, 2007 at 7:01 pm
Mimi & Raymond, yes, it’s a gift from God. Kaya nga daming nagmamadre este nagpapari na kalahi natin. Bwahaha…
April 12th, 2007 at 7:29 pm
Unfortunately my dad is not gay and he’s also dead na, so parang wala akong ma-contribute dito.
(pause)
HAHAHAHA!
Actually this is a very interesting topic, with lots of very interesting and varied stories.
I’ve read a portion of Raymond’s book (we’ve been friends since grade 5). Feeling ko lang it’ll end up longer than the thickest Harry Potter book. Feeling ko lang yun, ha, Bong, ehehehe. Better get a sharp editor.
April 12th, 2007 at 10:15 pm
That was a very good topic. I have learn a lot. As for me my dad’s brother is gay and all of my family believe that i inherited it from him. Im happy and thankful that im gay because all the love i can give to my family and friends are brought about my being GAY. Im glad to read all tghose`wonderful stories of the readers. Thanks a million.
April 12th, 2007 at 11:44 pm
ang dami namang tumalak … so ano nga ulit yung final answer?
April 13th, 2007 at 5:42 am
to jholou, sorry for that “fear” word, it’s the homophobic in me coming out. Guess, you’re right, if one of them turns out like me, then he’ll have the “gift” of enjoying and loving both genders, he he he he he he he.
to krisssss( napasobra ata s ko, he he he he he ). Your lover must be the luckiest guy on earth for having found the “faithfullest” of them all. Again, may kasabihan tayo ( parang beauty contest, he he he he ) na men are born polygamous, and we are still men , gay nga lang. I guess, had I become straight hetero, I would still be philandering kasi nga as my wife puts it, I’m a natural flirt. Her being the natural selosa, he he he he. Lucky me, she’s always barking at the wrong tree kasi mga bebot pinagseselosan nya o kaya mga mahinhing bading. Di nya alam type ko barakong bading he he he he he.
To frank, just wanting to be a dad is not a reason for getting married. If you marry someone, be ready to spend a lifetime with her or him. As for me, I really love my wife. We’ve been continuously on for seven years and we’ve been married for seven years. I guess, if you don’t love someone, you can’t stay that long in the realationship.With my lover/s my mind is set that it’s only temporary and basically friendship with lust lang.
As to the main topic, my belief is that it’s a case to case basis. The gift of being gay can be purely biological ( from any parent ), purely environmental ( having lived a life influenced by ladies/gays ), or combination of both in different degrees.
I’d say, all our stories are interesting and shed light to the topic
April 13th, 2007 at 5:47 am
we had a twin neighbor about my younger sister’s age. the other one is medyo obvious na effeminate but the is very masculine. all the while i thought i would only get confused with their names because they look exactly alike but one time when they slept over our place the more masculine twin went to my room early in the morning and asked me if i wanted to “do” it with him (me being already semi-known to some people). i got confused a bit because he’s too young (cute though and and balita eh medyo biggie siya) pero of cource i turned him down. kala niya ata isa akong carinderia na bukas sa lahat ng gustong kumain hahaha…
April 13th, 2007 at 10:01 am
CHUCHU CARACAS: Mine na lang siya kung ayaw moh! Hahahaha. Dios ko, cute na, biggie pa. Saan ka pa? Bakit, how young is this twin neighbor of yours? Bitay age ba?
April 15th, 2007 at 4:29 am
bading bading na yan my dad is bading my cousins bading my uncles bading all my six brother are all bading. puwede ba lahat na lang kasi tayo BADING para masaya ! o anong say ninyo !
April 16th, 2007 at 2:14 am
Magandang araw po. Tanong lang po sa mga married daddies na may male lover. Hindi ba ADULTERY din ang ginagawa niyo? Or is adultery exclusive to having an affair with a woman lang. Ano pong pananaw niyo dito?
April 18th, 2007 at 9:01 am
i just got married recently and expecting a child the end of summer. i was a bit hesitant especially when the moment of question when i was asked by the officiating priest if i will take my wife for the rest of my life. my world almost stopped and i almost fainted (i thought it aint real how people faint during their wedding but it was for real).
but i thought, i am doing this for my child who i am eager to know and be with for the rest of my life, knowing that i may not be a 100% good husband but for sure i will be an awesome father to my children.
my single life may end but it is another beggining of a new life for my newly born baby boy.
April 18th, 2007 at 9:10 am
CONFUSEDAKO ASKED: Kung adultery rin ba ang married men who has male lovers.
GIAN KINTARO: Yes, nature of adultery is a carnal connection between a married person and one unmarried, or between a married person and a spouse of another person, gender is not an exemption. So for me kung adultery man ang ginawa ko sa asawa ko. Ayos lang un, tao lang ako at may pagnanasa sa laman. it’s human nature at basta ang alam ko isa lang ang mahal ko.
April 19th, 2007 at 2:37 pm
marami akong friends who profess they’ve done it with str8 men. policemen, military, navy, etc. they’re very str8, but remain very loving in the gay bedroom. recently, i found out for myself when my very str8 officemate (married with a kid) took me to a motel when he was supposed to drive me home. “i deserve someone better” daw than my lover. we talked, but we didn’t do it. i didn’t want to ruin our friendship - which is eventually more important. (ganda ko ba???) now, when we see each other, there is no mention of the incident.
kaya lang minsan na lasing siya, sumunod siya sa men’s room at pinasok ako sa cubicle. he was crying on my shoulder, and then he kissed me. i told him it will be okay. pinauna ko sya at bumalik kami sa barkada namin.
April 20th, 2007 at 1:26 am
I am a father of two girls. And yes I am a bisexual. I have never came out to my family and I guess I never will. but my wife knew for I told her so. What she knows right now is that I have given up the “confused” part of me. I am happy having my own family. And to end this, I guess it doesn’t matter if you are gay or not. what matters is that you are able to share and give love to other people.
drama ko po ba?
anyway, i have a quick question. who among you knows where I can get the most recent Pinoy films na award winning, and ung iba sexy…hehe (ex. kubrador, twilight dancers, troika, etc.)
April 21st, 2007 at 12:31 am
salamat po sir GIAN KINTARO for the answer. that’s what i was thinking too.
April 27th, 2007 at 10:21 pm
ey shout out to silentwaterrunsdeep,
are you my doppleganger or sumthin’??
since we share the same situation, married with kids and my wife knows about my bisexuality even before we got hitched. the only deal is so long as i keep to my marriage vows.
heck, hirap nga lang to remain in the “straight and narrow” but handjobs will do well as well to stave off the same-sex horniness…
May 8th, 2007 at 12:11 am
shoutout for LOUIE
hey… i got intrigued of having another man with the same story. i want to know more about you. can you email me and let’s be friends?? my email address is can i know as well where you are from, age and where you work if possible.
basta i want us to exchange emails. wag lang masyado magexpect ng mabilis na pagreply kasi pati ang email add ko na yan e mahirap buksan. usually, halos katabi ko si misis kapag nagi-internet ako.
i hope we can keep in touch
October 19th, 2007 at 10:51 pm
Yes guys there are studies that say there’s a gay gene so why are there more gay men now when they should be dying out? Because, according to these studies, its the mothers who carry it! Intereseting no? BTW
October 19th, 2007 at 10:52 pm
BTW, im gay and so is my brother. Go genetics!